you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
She's the barista slut.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
