I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
she told me i tasted like america
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
