I just watched a girl at work pick her nose with 4 of her 5 fingers. So I now know what sausage biscuits taste like in vomit form.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
