ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
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