I think I am morally bankrupt
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
