Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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