okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
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