Its about making memories worth repressing
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
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