Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
Randomize
