Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
It's just like the Real World with babies
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Randomize
