By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
