i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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