Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
