is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
