I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
i am craving dick and cupcakes
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Randomize