if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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