I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Randomize