We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
My hand turned me down
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize