It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
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