$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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