I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
