I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
