Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize