I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
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