Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
