You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Randomize
