We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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