I wanna bring you to show and tell
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
