I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
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