if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
If anyone could figure out how to pee on someone's soul, it would be you.
You always know what to say to make me feel better.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize