If that was your dad, he is hot
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Randomize
