First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Forget work, lets run away, rob banks, and have kinky sex with fuzzy handcuffs.
IT'S LIKE YOU READ MY MIND.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
