Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
