I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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