I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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