they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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