okay pat passed out under dana's car
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
