used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
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