I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
I look better un-naked...
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
