I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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