It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
North Korea, Best Korea!
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
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