He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
