We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I just got released from jail. still in my kilt. bring pants damnit. they won't understand.
pants will make it better? really?
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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