allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
The feeling are messing with the penis
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
