I want to walk on stilts...naked
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize
