he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
