I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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