He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
