We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
