puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
