I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
